Bacon the boomerang kitten

Look at me. I now stretch out half the length of Ma's bed. I love the tummy tickles and I give nibbles back. I still love stealing gloves, and odd socks, and even bath mitts. Ma was looking for her Christmas present scrubby bath mitt the other day, she was so gutted when she found it in the corner of the bathrooom floor where I had hidden it. I had proper killed it was well, there was no fighting back.

There's been a Bigger Boy cat coming though the catflap for that last 10 nights, Sarnie screams at him and it's a bigger yowl when she shouts at me. She uses different and stronger cat swear words, words I've never heard a lady say before, not even to me. I saw a scratch across her face and nose, and Ma finally decided she had had enough.

As I'm still only 7 months old, I've never had a collar, let alone a heavy magnetic thing for the catflap hanging, Ma took to law into her own hands with the help of a plastic egg flipping spatula. On Friday night, Ma secretly altered the catflap so it would only allow cats in, and locked cats out. Scarface Monster Cougar Cat Male Mr Man came in and and ate all our biscuits, but when Sarnie challenged him there was a fight with very loud miaows and he ran to get out.

But he couldn't get out. This was at 5:30am. Ma must have been listening as she came downstairs in her pink fluffy housecoat and no slippers and locked me and Sarnie out of the kitchen - we couldn't see anything. All we saw was Ma take the little plastic egg spatula out of the dishwasher .

I am now 7 months old and not frightened of Sarnie, and still love toes, and socks, and like to give Ma the Warm Mouth and Warm Teeth and Bunny Kicks when she wears fluffy socks. I have recently discovered the delights of Empty Cardboard Boxes and  Open Drawers By Accident which I like To Lie In Wait [just in case there are monsters]

Ma said that she still likes to rub my belly and that I look like a stretchy boomerang when I am dozing off on her bed.